Tuesday, June 19, 2007

minnesota strange

i'd heard about "minnesota nice" before my midwestern move, but no one had warned me about minnesota strange. over the past week i've encountered a few situations that i can't help but chalk up to being just plain weird.

situation 1: party of the century.

i went to a party thrown by al's boss. the theme? sex and the city meets entourage meets dr. 90210. not knowing what to expect, i showed up in my sunday best. of course we showed up just in time for the botox demo! i wasn't entirely interested in seeing what all the fuss was about, so while everyone scurried away to watch the volunteer youth away before their very eyes, i opted to stay inside and check out the wines brought by the south african wine distributors. but the fun doesn't stop there... after the demo people were encouraged to get botox of their own. who woulda thunk that you could get a little slice of los angeles right here in good ol' minneapolis?

situation 2: banana hammock on wheels.

after the botox party, al and i needed a bit of sanity, so we headed over to grumpy's for a few bloody marys. picture this: two girls wearing nice cocktail dresses walk into a bar full of people wearing nothing but underwear. "you guys look way overdressed" was a severe understatement. but thank you for noticing anyway, mr. thong man. upon al's explaination, i discovered that there is a bicycle group in the twin cities that arranges to go out once a month(?) and ride around in nothing but their underwear. and apparently grumpy's was a spot along the way. of course, it definitely made for some good eye candy and conversation pieces. and alisun and i couldn't help but wonder what we would be wearing if we were brave enough to join the group. but alas, before you could say "hanes her way," the group was off and cycling to their next party spot.

situation 3: stop or i'll shoot.

the day following botox and nearly-naked biking proved to be no-less interesting. after i opened the store, a group of five men came walking in. and these men looked like they were on a mission. i almost wanted to make a joke that they looked like a group out of the sopranos, but caught myself before i realized that they were in fact four bodyguards protecting one unidentifiable man. the four men spread out along the store and took their positions looking out into the mall while their client tasted some peanut butter. i still can't figure out who it was, but i am assuming it was some sort of politician because he definitely didn't look like an actor. so if anyone can help me identify who it was by the following description, i'd be really grateful. he was middle-aged, balding, brown hair, short/average height, sort of chubby. kind of generic, don't you think?

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