Friday, August 26, 2005

tv surprise

kate and i used to have this thing almost every night called "movie surprise." basically, before we went to bed, one of us would choose a movie to watch and not tell the other what it was, and we'd have to get what it was. i think we both still miss that part about college. for some reason we must have watched keeping the faith about 50 times, and i think it was mainly because of the part when ben stiller goes on a date with that over-excited jewish girl, and he punches her in the stomach, then later she goes of on her not-so-pc rant about her headband that was made from the "heavily supervised" mentally challenged.

before we go on, i would like to apologize in advance to any church people who may be reading this. nothing i'm going to say is really that bad, i just mention some questionable material. anyways, in my own way i get a little bit of tv surprise every night here. let me back up a little bit. a few weeks ago, at night, i was watching friends. i went to brush my teeth and when i came back it was scrambled porn. figuring i must have accidentally changed the channel, i started flipping through the stations again. couldn't find friends so i figured it was over and went to bed. a few night later, i was flipping through my favorite channels late at night, and once again i got some scambled porn. this time i figured that channel 57, one of my favorite channels that plays quite a few american shows, must change over to porn at a certain time every night. i also noticed a little playboy bunny in the upper left corner. so, it's the playboy channel! this week, again i was watching friends, and literally in the middle of the episode it switched over and i began to hear that oh-so-cliche sleazy 70s guitar beat. i looked at my watch and saw that it was 10 pm. alas, i had found the answer. every night at 10 pm, good ol' wholesome channel 57 changes into scrambled porn. and even though i know what's going on now, it still doesn't help when i'm on autopilot flipping through my favorite channels at night and all of a sudden i hear women screaming. in fact, last night when i came back from the pc bang i turned the tv on, and i had been watching channel 57 before i left... but now it was after 10 and i could hear what was going on even before the scambled image showed up. tv surprise, indeed.

kind of funny, too, now that i think about it. the clarks have been watching "the girls next door" on e! and apparently they think i remind them of/act/talk just like hugh heffner's "girlfriend no. 1," minus the long blond hair. i am not saying this to brag, i guess the opposite. and somehow i thought i'd return the "compliment" by telling john that he reminds me of house (from the show)... but he didn't take that so well either, although i didn't really think it was an insult. i stand by my opinion. i guess my point is there's a little bit of playboy inside all of us... including the little 10 year olds who wander around here not knowing that the cute little rabbit on their tshirts is indeed the playboy bunny. i've seen quite a few girls wearing these shirts. guess they're getting an early start.

subject change:

i did some quick calculations and i figured out exactly how many hours i'm going to be working. not counting the half hour that i have to be here before i start working, i am working a total of 17 hours and 20 minutes. take away the dinner breaks and 10 minute breaks, and i'm actually teaching 15 hours and 40 minutes. it's a mad mad mad world, and i'm loving every second of it.

also, i finally bought this drink i keep seeing a commercial for. there's a girl walking down the street drinking and saying over and over something like "saramandi... sarani" i completely made that up but in my little tanya-land i imagine it's something like "he loves me he loves me not." anyways, it's iced green tea and i got the blue bottle, jasmine flavored. well i can definitely taste the jasmine... it tastes like my jasmine breeze bath and body works lotion smells, which just confuses my senses because i felt like i was drinking my lotion.

i swear my posts are getting weirder and weirder everyday... which means i must be relaxing more and becoming my normal weird self.

fin.

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